FemPornPoonany


sfw_porn

My friend, Sarah, sends me links to various blog entries on porn and all things sex worker-related. One that immediately caught my attention was at the following link. Feministe Blah Blah Blah

Personally, the entry didn’t move me. Like I told Sarah, it seems like the author, Kaelynn, was swallowing a bitter ass pill when timidly encouraging other feminists out there to look at sex work from a more academic perspective, rather than bashing it for its degradation of women. But, man, some ladies simply cannot jump that hurdle! They still believe that pornography continues to objectify women, cause them emotional, mental, and physical shame, and make sex look like a glossy representation of what truly is an awkward yet amazing activity.

This is what I posted:

Personally, I’ve been a sex worker for three years. I’ve been in movies, stripped, was a call girl, and now I’m a professional dominatrix (which has always been my love). I believe that this is a great launching pad in terms of deconstructing how feminists should view pornography from a political and social perspective. But, I always wondered why more feminists haven’t spoken up on how they view pornography from a sexual perspective (and not just fem porn). (Sidenote: Feminist porn is fucking boring! Part of me believes that when girls say, Oh I like fem porn it’s not because they actually enjoy twiddling their clits to this shit but it makes them feel better about themselves, rather than watching that horrible degrading porno where that woman shoves a baseball bat up her ass) (Further sidenote: Bella Donna deserves a medal for such a feat)

That’s because (and, as a self-proclaimed feminist, I have gone down this road) I believe we compromise our own sexuality with feminist values. To me, I believe it is unfair to fashion our kinks and desires based on feminist notions. I do believe in using these same notions and values to improve the conditions of sex workers, in this point adult film performers, specifically-that way taboo pornography such as rape porn can deliver on the fantasy while condoning a safe working environment for all of those involved.

Quite honestly, I’ve been on both sides of the fence about women’s desire, fantasies, etc and if they are truly being spoken to through pornography. My opinion is this: one of the only reasons why we (women and you men out there who are being nice) feel this way is because of the stigma that not only the media has created but we have created too. I have news for you: There are tons and tons and tons of types of pornography out there… for everyone. Men, women, transgendered! “Mainstream” pornography is mythic and the only reason that we continue to believe there is mainstream porn is because there are not enough of us consuming (which means buying and owning) the type of movies that can turn us on. Women’s desires are no different than men’s in terms of what we fantasize about-and if there is a so-called difference, then we are being told what to fantasize about, and that ain’t right. If Jane Doe is into rough sex, rape fantasies, tentacle fucking an alien from planet Mars, or fake tits and blonde hair then who the fuck cares? Let her enjoy herself without having to feel the weight of feminism creeping into her thoughts. Let’s face it-patriarchal societies exclude us from having our own sexual desire altogether. Let’s be progressive and take it back, whether we like what we are into or not.

Feminists should not be anti-porn or anti-sex… they just shouldn’t. And if you are, then help us sex workers, producers, directors, filmmakers, and patrons by visiting websites like

http://www.sexinthepublicsquare.org
http://www.sweat.org
http://www.swop.org
http://www.spreadmagazine.org
…and many many others.

and get involved by helping us establish conditions that are safe and consensual for performers, crew, and so on.

And, yes indeed, watch the porn that turns you on (though I don’t know too many that involve real tentacle aliens, Jane… there’s always Hentai!)

I didn’t get too many direct responses, except for the following:

“And Leon Symone, I appreciate what you’re saying, but personally I’ve never felt like feminism has put a “weight” or a stop on my desires. On the contrary, feminism taught me to value and take joy in my own body and the honesty of my sexuality. I think there are some highly problematic issues in the way that our culture treats women and sex; I don’t want to let go of my feminism in the bedroom.”

Another comment supports my point of feminism sneaking into the bedroom:

…The most feminist-friendly porn you produce could be used in ways that degrade women. Because it exists in a patriarchy. Again, I suppose I applaud you for doing what you think is right, but some of us will continue to think of porn as being inherently non-feminist. Neutral, maybe. Not feminist though, not now…

No wonder they call you bitches Feminazis!

Pornography is not meant to please everyone in a social or political way. It is not meant to fight for social justice or teach us something about the way we interact with each other. It’s primary purpose is to satisfy our desires and aid us in exercising those desires through self satisfaction, 1-on-1 tournaments, or group matches. I understand the need for women to have their desires met through pornography, but, quite honestly WE ALL DO NOT HAVE THE SAME DESIRES! Not all of us care if the women actually faked it or if the performers really liked each other, etc. As I said before, the conditions of performers on set, their treatment in the adult industry, and other thoughtful issues should be completely separated from the real relationship we should have from pornography. When I say that feminism creeps into the bedroom, this is what I mean. We are so overloaded with questions like Is she enjoying it? Did they force her? What if she’s being raped? That we end up censoring our own fantasies to lite, demure desires. And if you dont like what you see, then make your own goddamned porn!

Here’s another comment:

“Could it be that some people who make porn are actually happier in their work than, say, a mine worker in South Africa? It might be possible.”

Huh?

ie-porn

A pattern I also picked up on is that feminists are actually practicing the same thing that makes them anti-porn to begin with : Objectfication of the female. To the patriarchy, we are mere objects of desire, of lust. To most feminists, we are a constant rape victim, incapable of choosing our own fates, and our sexuality is in another person’s hands. Pretty much, porn stars are people too. Women in the industry make bad choices when considering what to do with a fistful of cum in their face-should the performers, the producer, the industry be blamed for her choice? There is a difference between non-consenting sex that is videotaped and a regretting moment with a donkey. Just because a female performer decided during or afterward that it isn’t getting her off doesn’t mean she was forced or coerced to do it. And, again, it doesn’t mean we should become anti-porn; it just means we need to make more of an effort to instill basic guidelines and regulations on set.

For me, I enjoyed what I did. I didn’t have an orgasm in every movie, but it was better than working at a 9-5 on someone else’s time. And while I may have griped about what my desires are versus what is really being portrayed, I also realized that my type of porn is out there-I just need to go get me some of it on my own terms. And you should all do the same!

Ps. Kaelynn is completely wrong! Andrea Dworkin hijacked feminism to peddle her own conservative, restricting views on decency by labeling our sexual freedoms as rape. Once you start throwing the word “rape” around, then everything becomes a woman’s dilemma, despite how one-sided it may seem. She fucked it up for everyone and I don’t think she deserves to even be mentioned.

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