1 Cup – 2 Chicks


cup-chicks-shirt

Happy New Year… this was a bad year for me. Don’t cry, because it was probably yours too. What can you do but consider that there’s going to be something better starting today (or yesterday)… right? However, a disturbing web-sensation on the Internet has definitely chimed in the new year on a good note.

A friend of mine at work told me to go to the website www.cupchicks.com. He said to watch the reaction clips first, then watch the actual footage. So, I go to the website, and already the homepage made a big hype about itself, as if there was a parade to introduce the actual parade… if that makes sense. Now I thought this might have to do with horses or penises, fetuses or barnyard animals just doing strange things. I bypassed the reaction shots altogether; the main attraction was going to be either a disappointment or amazingly offensive… and if I was offended my cursor was already pointed on the exit button. So I watched the clip… and my expression drew a blank. I shrugged. I smirked, maybe. I did not have the same reaction as the people on the homepage, or my coworker, who seemed more awestruck and fascinated that such exotics existed. I wasn’t offended by any means; I just didn’t see anything wrong or weird about it.

I thought about this feeling of total okayness. I wondered if this was how potential serial killers felt when they hung an animal from a tree. Or maybe, maybe this sense of calm was akin to that of up-and-coming child molesters who hardly cringe when perusing websites that feature illegally young gymnasts in compromising and unnecessary poses and positions. What is so eh about that which is so wrong…?

I not only wondered what this type of desensitization to Cup Chicks meant, but I also considered if the clip desensitized viewers to the point of reshaping its once repulsive status into a conventional oddity, which is kind of what pornography does on a realistic level. From deep throat to anal, porno has made it acceptable to talk about what we normally wouldn’t publicly discuss.

Almost all of us can say with confidence that times have changed and that we are far more vocal than our mothers and grandmothers about the topics of sex and gender. However, I think we’re getting way too excited about the excitement of talking about it way too fast. What we don’t consider is how we talk about sex, rather than the fact that we do.

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I remember reading Omega’s sexuality book for my orgasm speech and found a study on the way we communicate about our sexual peak. The couples interviewed were mostly young adults in their 20s or early 30s. When the women were asked about their orgasms, they used certain words and phrases, such as when “…he gave her…” an orgasm or “…he made her…” come, a sign that the women felt passive in their own sexual experience. I’ve heard, and even thought myself, Well, this is progress, isn’t it? He is showing me the attention that I need. He is acknowledging my orgasm and making sure that I get one… Pronto! Sure, but, one must wonder why he is key to achieving my orgasm. Is an orgasm an impenetrable essence-like breaking a coconut to suck on the insides-or is it this secret constant of the individual, a type of cosmic charge attained by being present and seeking it out?

The men, however, felt as though it was their responsibility to give their female partners pleasure. Deriving pleasure from this need to “…make her cum…” created a dymanic relationship by proving their masculinity and sexual prowess. One wonders what happened when the man was unable to deliver, what then would his sympathetic mate have to say? Maybe she would let out a little playful squeal to signal to her honey job well done. Or maybe she would fake it, just so she can go to bed? (Un)Fortunately, men couldn’t “fake” an orgasm, or could they? There are studies that show men are capable of achieving orgasms in which they do not need to ejaculate. This most certainly opens up a new way to perceive an orgasm as something intangible and fleeting like light itself…

What this has to do with Cup Chicks is vaguely evident. However, I will say that clips like these do give us permission to explore our desires, no matter how gross or weird they may be. Fetishes are fetishes; orgasms are orgasms. And neither are guarded exclusively by men or women. We don’t need a key to unlock our innermost desires. All it takes are erotic materials and an imagination.

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