AFN’s Road to Kink Presents… Wet Love: Sploshing, Messy Play, and Pie Fetishists


It’s that time again, gang. It’s that time to boldly go where most blogs have not gone before… okay, that’s not totally true. But, who does it better, baby?

Anyway, this week we’re in for a real treat… remember those high school food fights of yesteryear? Remember the satisfaction you received when you hit that hot lunchlady in the face and chest with your cup of cherry red jello..? And then that hot librarian joined in by dousing her with a half gallon jug of creamy chocolate milk?

Maybe that only happened in my cafeteria, but whatev.

You might need a towel and some blue tarp for this fetish. Today, we’re going to get Wet and Messy!

A Brief History…

Often known as Wet and Messy fetish (WAM), this particular type of kinky play involves the application of various substances to the naked or clothed body. Foodplay specifically involves various condiments and foods, such as honey and whipped cream, for sexual satisfaction. However, WAM Fetishsts have a number of different substances at their disposal, such as mud, liquid lotions, paints, etc. Those who are into wet play often enjoy water and various juices to get them off.

So, why would an ordinary gal or guy wanna splosh (a reference to food play) with his or her mate? Well, why not? It appeals to our tactile senses, doesn’t it? Imagine the feeling of cold water dripping down the crack of your ass. Or the feel of warm chocolate pudding in between your breasts.

So, what are the definitive must-haves for an excellent Wet and Messy session? They’re listed here for your convenience.

…You’re welcome.

10 – Mud

Nothing’s more primal than a roll around in the mud. Mud is the type of substance that begs for you to dominate (or submit to) your lover… or at least squeal like a pig. You can have your mud as cakey as clay so you can smear it all over your body. Or, just add water so you can swim around in the filth. Just be careful you’re rolling in that and not… well, you know…

9 – Slime

Seriously. I mean, didn’t you ever watch You Can’t Do That on Television? Don’t tell me you didn’t get just a little excited when you saw that rain of green-colored oatmeal shower those naughty teens. I did. If you can collect enough algae to make your motor run, then go for it! Otherwise, you may need to improvise. Make it extra chunky or add some stickier substances to really get that oozing effect. Pfft, not feeling creative? Then buy some gunk online.

8 – Peanut Butter

Choosy moms may choose Jif… but I doubt it’s for the same reasons why you and your lover might buy a jar. Whether you like it chockful of peanuts or extra creamy, this wholesome condiment is just the right balance of thick stickiness. Use it to rub against your thighs, in your hair, or wherever you please. Although, if you have allergies, you may need to keep the pb back in the fridge.

7 – Baked Beans

I’m fucking serious. Baked beans is where it’s at. Get yourself a can or two and you’ll see what I’m talking about. Those small beans are soft enough to squish underneath your toes. Of course, you don’t want to waste the bean sauce… that’s the best part. It also dries sticky, which is a Perfect for some sexual hijinks around the campfire, warm up those baked beans and you’ve got yourself a delicious mess.

Ann Margaret rolling around in baked beans and another wet and messy substance on the list.


6 – Liquid Latex

This wondeful jar of latex love is a favorite not only amongst WAM fetishists but latex fetishists as well. It comes in a collection of seductive colors and there’s enough to cover an entire body. Have fun pouring it all over your lover. A really hot spot is to pour it over the nipples; once it dries you can peel it off and discover how perky those pair of nips have become. For the one who receives a latex bath, be forewarned that it tends to stick to even the tiniest hairs of your skin. Shave as much as you can and rinse whatever latex remains.

5 – Body Paint

Speaks for itself, doesn’t it? Using body paint can inspire your imagination in more ways than one. Always go for the non-toxic stuff and choose as many colors as possible. You can sensuously drip it over your partner’s body or fill small balloons with paint and throw them at your lover. It’s expressionism meets sex, obviously. So, let those creative juices flow.


4 – Honey

Oh… honey. Hmmmm. Sweet. Sticky. What else is there to say? How could you resist putting your mouth on a body part dripped in honey? What’s great is that you can use honey as a natural adhesive and decorate your lover in sprinkles or God knows what else. Of course, it is quite a mess; but, it’s nothing that a long hot shower can’t cure. And that brings us too….

3 – Water

At first, we wouldn’t think that water would fit under the WAM criteria. Sure, it’s wet (obviously), but not so messy. Well, my friend, you are completely wrong. At one point or another, everyone has a fantasy where water makes a cameo. Bikini car washes, swimming pools, beaches… hell, even your own bathtub can be a wild fantasy come true. Are you wearing clothes? Even better! Who doesn’t love a wet t-shirt contest? Yep. H20 is the way to go!

2 – Pie

Warm. Crusty. Creamy. Almost always fruity. And with a little whipped cream on top. The infamous pie scene from American Pie pretty much sums up why pies are on the top of the list. Pie is the ultimate indulgence. Cherry. Apple. Everyone has a flavor that they enjoy best. Although the taste isn’t of primary concern. Many enjoy the warm gooey insides of the pie dripping off their skin. Others love to drive a pie into the face of his/her lover. Some pies are made just out of whipped cream and used for that particular purpose. Pastries in general are always fun to play with, but a pie symbolizes hope. A Pie symbolizes freedom. Pies are America.


1 – Chocolate

I’m already getting excited just thinking about all the dirty things I can do with a bottle of Hershey’s Chocolate Syrup. It’s the very best of aphrodisiacs, has the same euphoric sensations as shooting up Heroin, can replace a lover on a lonely night, and is fucking delicious. Thank you, chocolate, for making sex so much more fun!

Are there any other substances that I left out? When’s the last time you made a mess of your bedroom? Leave a comment here and let me know.

As is the tradition here on AFN, we will explore a darker side to substances. Get ready to puke… it would turn me on if you do!

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